“While you desire specialness for yourself, your true Self will remain hidden and unknown, and since this is a Course that seeks to reveal your true identity, specialness must be seen for what it is so that you will desire it no longer. You can have specialness or your true Self, but never both. (A Course of Love, 15.3)”
Affirmation: “I would deny specialness in favor of my true Self.”
1 – Egocentric Specialness
Specialness is an egocentric desire to be better than other people (or, occasionally, the reverse–worse than others). For whatever reason, we think that if we are different, rather than the same, we will merit more in this life. We think that being special means that we have more than others–always “more.” But this reasoning is fallacious.
2 – Specialness in Other People
We need to recognize that nobody welcomes specialness in another person–except as that specialness seems to give to the other something that he/she wants. We look for certain special things in our chosen life partner, but we often find that this specialness is a mirage, and then we may drift away, only to seek again a specialness that will never last.
3 – Competition
In our peer relationships, we do not want another to excel in the competition. We want to be better. But does that make us more loved? I think not. Cooperation in a common goal means that all peers are equals, and equals we are indeed in God’s eyes. All of us have been given everything, ultimately. But on this earth, this is not so, and so we often find ourselves envious of the goods of another. We do not love in such a state of mind, and love is the great need of all of us (as always).
4 – Self/Christ
We need the true Self, which is the Christ within. When we really consider these words, how could we desire anything other? We do not receive knowledge of the Self when the go reigns. Everything sought by the ego ultimately turns to ashes and dust in our hands. All of the ego’s playthings are temporary. But when we turn from the desire to be better than our brother/sister, we are primed to know the Self that we all share, for we are all One. Then we know that true boons of this world, as well as the world beyond. We have indeed found our way home.
I would drop specialness today for all time. Competition just wore me out, when I tried it, and try it I did for years. Finally, in the last 20 years or so, my desire for cooperative living has won out over specialness. Thank You for this insight and the willingess and ease with which I have been able to accomplish it. Only You did that.
Thank You for the understanding that cooperation works much better than competition. There is no way that competition, over the long haul, can bring anything but misery.
Help me to resist specialness in all its forms. I would choose a right sort of humility, and I would choose to avoid arrogance. I can do what You lead me to do, when You help me. Only then, when You help.