Special Relationships

“Once you are no longer concerned with needs and the meeting of needs you will no longer be concerned with special relationships. You will realize that there is no loss but only gain involved in letting them go. (Treatises of A Course of Love: Treatise on the Nature of Unity and Its Recognition, 9.16)”

Affirmation: “I will let my special relationships go in favor of the holy.”


1 – Needs Met

Is it really true that we won’t have to worry about needs any longer? Indeed so. Our needs are met at the point of need as we progress toward Home. And Jesus assures us that we have arrived. I think that this is his way of encouraging us to stop seeking. We can read and reread favorite inspirational messages, but our way Home is assured.

2 – Longing

We still long for special relationships, because we do not want to be alone, and our significant relationships are, to us, the best place to go for solace. This is egoic thinking. We do not have to listen to our egos any longer. We will be free of the ego when we have turned outside from fearful thoughts.

3 – Ego

Yesterday I indicated, based on the passage from A Course of Love, that turning aside from fear did in fact eliminate the ego from our thinking. This transition seems hard to us, because we have thrived on fear, even invited it. But this was the egoic mind in full force. We need to realize that this part of our belief about ourselves, the ego, is eliminated when we make a concerted effort to choose anew every time that we are tempted to do the egotistical thing (an interpretation, not stated in ACIM or ACOL). When we turn aside from egotistical thinking, we also turn aside from fear, for fear is activated by the down cycle of the egoic oscillations. We have known flights of joy, but these soon turn to pain and even suffering–when in the throes of the egoic mind. Surely we want something better for ourselves now.

4 – Holy Relationship

Choose holy relationships over special. Or, as we are encouraged to do in A Course in Miracles, turn the special relationship into the holy. We may feel that our relationships are disjointed during this period, but it will be the very best thing for us. We can choose no higher, unless it be a choice for God Himself.


Dear Father/Mother,

I would turn all of my special relationships into holy ones. I start with my chosen significant other and fan out from that one. I can do this, for You will help. I know, if I follow guidance, that this is Your way for me. Having holy relationships, or in particular one holy relationship, is my primary way home.

I would not be fearful today, for fear feeds the ego. And I would not allow my mind to dip into egotistical thoughts, for this is the essence of what goes wrong for me. Help me to reach out to You for solace. And may I not forget others in my search. We all need each other, and we need each other to eliminate fear and to be peaceful and harmonious.


Author: Celia Hales

I intend "Miracles Each Day" to offer inspiration and insight into A Course in Miracles, A Course of Love, The Way of Mastery, Choose Only Love, Mirari, and similar readings.

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