1 – Day 19
“Those of you who are the forerunners of the way of Mary may have felt confusion over your sense of calling. You know you are called to something, and something important, but it does not have a form within your mind and so you see not how it can become manifest in the world. In other words, you know not what to do. You perhaps see no ‘specific’ accomplishment in your future, but see instead a way of living as the ultimate accomplishment. (Dialogues of A Course of Love, Day 19)”
2 – Way of Living
A way living is the ultimate way of Mary; it is not achieving, out in the world, as doers have done in the way of Jesus. This becomes a reflective way of life, a way of relationship, often in the family, and is sometimes understood, perhaps, by women more so than by men. This is according to the stereotype of how women have been viewed in a patriarchal society. And in the new world, men and women both will be far more likely just to live, just to live in relationship, than to try to achieve, even if that achievement is ego-less.
3 – Comforting
This way is a comforting way, this way of Mary. It is a very loving way, this way of relationship. We move in circles that are near to us; we heal each other in ways that are impossible if one is out in the world trying to make a mark, to actively change the world for the better.
4 – Change Happens from Within
A Course in Miracles and A Course of Love both emphasize that change of the world happens only when we first see an inward change. We change amiss when we attempt to overturn the old order by force of external means. We change what we perceive, and then we change what we know, and in the doing, we change quite a bit in the outside world. Even followers in Mary’s tradition will change quite a bit in the outside world, but it will be a by-product of that change that happens closer to home, closer to the heart.
5 – Contented
“Being content is being fulfilled by the way in which you express who you are—by the way you express your content—your wholeness. Those who use their gifts to create the truth they see are those who in ‘doing’ find their way to true contentment and true creation. . . .Those called to the way of Mary are called to be what they want to see reflected in the world and to the realization that this reflection is the new way of creation. In their being they become what they want to create. (Dialogues of A Course of Love, Day 19)”
6 – Becoming
Those of the way of Mary are in the midst of “becoming” a being whom they want to create. In their Selves they embody change. If one first becomes something that is actually desired in the outside world, we truly make a change over which we have some control. We can always change our own selves. And in the changing does the world itself change as well.
7 – Being
We rest content when our very being has been transformed, and if the way of Mary is our way, then this is what we are about.
8 – Interaction
“The way of Mary is not a place or state of non-interaction however. This is not the state or place of the monks, nuns, or the contemplatives of old. It is not solitary nor isolated, nor confined to a specific community. It is a way of existence in which relationship is paramount. It is not listening to a calling to ‘do’ but a calling to ‘become.’ (A Course of Love: Dialogues, p. 180)”
9 – Relationships
Relationships do matter a great deal. And when we are following Mary’s way, we major in relationships. They are our focus, they are our reason for living. Cannot we see that women have historically played this role, even when the ego was the dominant inner force?
10 – Rest
There is rest in the way of Mary. We no longer try to change anybody or anything that is outside of us, unless that change happens naturally through our interaction with them. We aren’t trying to a role model for anyone; we are just “being.” We are not “doing” in the active way that Jesus was doing. His example life is not called for by those who follow Mary.
11 – Not “Doing”
The way of Mary is not a “doing” so much as a way of “being.” This does not mean that doing will be absent from our brothers and sisters who follow Mary’s way, but their primary mode of living will be in relationships. They will not always be as known by our world as those who are actively doing. But they will not dwell in obscurity. As we fulfill the obligations and mission for which we live in the world, we will naturally move more toward being rather than doing.
12 – All
Eventually all will follow the way of Mary. This may be hard for us to understand at this time in our history, when there is so much that we perceive as “wrong” with this world. But as we all learn to “be” rather than to try (sometimes misguidedly) to “do,” then we will see that no change is lasting that does not include an internal change. This is a largely unexpressed but implicit tenet of Jesus in both A Course in Miracles and A Course of Love.
13 – Anchors
Both Jesus and Mary are anchors in this time of transition. Both ways–doing and being–are needed as we seek to bring to our world a new, transformed world.
14 – Acclaim
“This is not to say that those called to the way of Jesus will find acclaim and those called to the way of Mary will find obscurity. Many called to the way of Mary will ‘do’ much that is greatly desired in the world but what they do will be a byproduct of their way of being rather than a means of facilitating that way of being. (Dialogues of A Course of Love, Day 19)”
15 – In Relationship
So we live, first of all, in relationship when we are called to the way of Mary. And we may find acclaim, but it is no longer foremost to us, even when we are outside the realm of the ego. We don’t have to “do” to achieve our purpose in life; we just “are.”
16 – Way of Jesus
“Without those pursuing the way of Jesus, those pursuing the way of Mary would have a much more difficult task. There would be little space in which to anchor the new. Those following the way of Jesus create the openness of the spacious Selves who allow for the anchors of the new to be cast and thus to ride out the many storms of this time of transition. (Dialogues of A Course of Love, Day 19)”
17 – New Age
Those of the way of Jesus have paved the way for the new age, those who will follow in the way of Mary. Someone needed to actively work in the world to bring about change—by setting an example, and, earlier, by teaching and learning. Now those goals have been achieved, and many of the way of Mary have gained much from the accomplishment. Now the time is ripe for simply “being,” no longer out in the world creating a new order.
18 – New Order
Yet the way of Jesus, the new order, needed to be achieved, to give the Marys of the world a place to rest content. Now those of the way of Mary can walk serenely in a world that did not exist a few years ago. It exists now, for a few followers of Mary—and more followers of Mary will come in the years henceforth.
I have spent most of my life “doing”–sometimes in a feverish pace. I am so relieved that Jesus does not ask me to “do” compulsively any longer. Thank You for the words that indicate that “being” in relationships is also a good thing. Help me to truly understand the way of Mary.
As I balance the way of Jesus–the doing–with the way of Mary–the being–may I have Your constant support. I cannot live well in this world without Your guidance every step of the way. Thank You.
2 thoughts on “Living the Way of Mary”
I’ve been looking for active/passive associations in Christianity(similar to Shiva/Shakti in Hinduism) and the way of Jesus as “doer” and the way of Mary as “being” is just what I’ve been searching for!! Thanks so much for sharing ❤
I am glad to hear this. There are revelations in A Course of Love not found anywhere else, I think.