“You believed that for every gain there was also a loss. For you believed that every step in the advancement of your separated state was a step away from God and your real Self. This belief was based in logic, but the logic of the illusion—in which you believed you chose to separate from God out of defiance and a desire to be one with God no longer. This could not be further from the truth and is the cause of all your suffering, for contained within this belief was the belief that with each successful step toward independence came a corresponding step away from God.” (ACOL, T3:2.5)
We find from this quotation for today that we have been our own worst enemy, something in folk wisdom that is often stated even while we live egoic lives. We have even been masochistic, as this quotation hints, punishing ourselves for taking steps toward independence, because these steps were believed to be steps taken away from God—for which we would punish ourselves before, we thought, He would get a chance to do so. We surely believed that our fear of God was justified, for we thought that He blamed us for our desire for independence, autonomy.
We were trying to go it alone in a friendless universe, and this was never original purpose, and so this new purpose was bound to fail. Going it alone was not a part of anything that was possible in reality; going it alone could happen only in illusion. Our reason for being with others is contained in our creation, for relationship, with union of all, is part of the glorious plan of original creation. Our relationships with others create the interdependence that allows us to function successfully, cooperatively, in this world. And relationship and unity will be what create the world for which Jesus is carefully preparing us to create.
We did not leave God out of defiance. We were just rebels, desiring too much too fast. Living in form was a gigantic learning feat, and this new creation demanded a patience that we, in our immature self, did not have. And this failing of ours is best characterized as an adolescent rebellion.
We are taking steps back to God now. We have, in short, had enough. And it is about time.
Go easy with ourselves. It has been a long haul.
This beautiful day should never be rued. I am given a new day each morning, and often the way that I begin that day determines how things will unfold. Today began with writing a dialogue with You, imagining what You might say to me. Nearly all my days begin this way. Today, sitting on my sun/screen porch, I felt close to You. The words that I attributed to You were coming from my heart, but I think You hold a place there. I think I am a part of You. And knowing this is a great blessing.
Be with me for the remainder of the day. I sometimes take on more projects than I can do easily, and You would have me work effortlessly and with ease. Save me from myself if I am too eager. That was largely the mistake that all of us made eons ago, and now many of us know better.
Thank You for coming to me in silence, but for guiding my imagination to let that silence form words of guidance.