“Rest assured, you will continue to project upon others what remains unhealed and unforgiven within yourself. Each time you react to another, you are being given a sign that there is some kind of energy that has been presented to your awareness that you have not forgiven within yourself. If someone is critical and you react every time they are critical, rest assured, you have not healed that part of your own being—that part of your own experience of being critical of others.” (“The Way of the Heart,” WOM, Chapter 3, Page 35)
Jesus is here describing how projection works. We see in others what we really have within ourselves. If there are unhealed parts of the self (and there always are), and we see something negative in another, rest assured that we are seeing it because we can identify with it. We are seeing as if in a mirror.
This is how we can heal. What presents itself in another, and we deplore, is something that we secretly deplore in ourselves. We do then immediately identify what needs “fixing” in us. The mirror has saved us from ourselves.
We would not respond at all unless there were something in us that recognized the deed, or word, in another. We see that deep within, we are guilty of the same.
This is actually a magnificent way for the cosmos to work. It is the way that we heal, sooner rather than later. We see something in another, and then we are moved (if we are smart about it), to heal that “bad” thing in ourselves.
Ask for help in this, for truly we are never alone in our agony.