Is this what has been going on for me as I resist library administration?
Not that anybody has asked. I say ahead of time that I’m not interested so that I won’t be tempted with an offer I can’t refuse (an offer that “can’t” be refused normally appears, at least for me, to be ego-inspired).
I have to be certain that the ego is not the motivator here.
Perhaps I am destined to be in indecision about this for a while. Maybe I should stay in non-resolution until I learn what my soul is trying to tell me. Yet non-resolution over a long period of time, I have learned, usually counsels “no.”